all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
God gave him joint rollers for hands
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
