her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
