I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Randomize
