We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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