I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
