Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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