I'm really into asian looking animals
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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