so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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