So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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