no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize