have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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