Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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