you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
