He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
