so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
