is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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