ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Randomize
