I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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