I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
