if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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