i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
We are two peas in an std pod
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize