I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Someone signed my nipple.
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