Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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