I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize