Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
All the doctor said was why
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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