Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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