We named our party play list daddy issues
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
