I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
