I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
