am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize