these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
