how hairy? two words: wookie tits
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
