And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
