PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Randomize
