the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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