Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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