that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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