i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
