dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Randomize
