If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
