so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
