the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
