Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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