Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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