soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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