2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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