Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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