Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize
