My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
It's shark week go big or go home
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
