We won't sleep together?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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