OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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