ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize